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Controlling Behavior - 6 Keys to Avoid Gaslighting Psychological Abuse

gaslighting psychological abuse by Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
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"Gaslighting" is a term we've heard to refer to mind-messing. That is, telling someone something that is untrue to be true. And then dancing in, over and around it until confusion sets in for the listener and anyone else that is an earshot away.

It's actually a form of mental and psychological abuse, because at its core is control. You see the gaslighter will keep the gaslighting game going until he/she wins. And winning is resurrecting your utter confusion and willingness to buy the fact that "the sky is indeed orange."

Get it? I know you do, especially if you have ever been exposed to or participated in this form of mental, emotional, psychological abuse.

Here are some things you will want to do to avoid being victimized by gaslighting.

1) Keep your eyes and ears open wide when in the presence of gaslightering control freaks. Pay attention to details.

2) Cultivate an unwavering belief in your intuition. And when it speaks to you, listen with utmost respect.

3) Understand what the gaslighter's true motive is in his/her exchange with you. It's usually about simply getting you to see what you know to be true as to be untrue, or vice-versa.

4) Do not let the gaslighter think you bought his/her story, as this only gives permission for more psychological abuse of gaslighting.

5) As always, recognize, understand and trust the mental manipulations and distortions of reality are not about you.

6) Lastly and most significantly, know you do not have to "win" to be centered and find peace. A successful closure to a bout of gaslighting does not require that you convince the controlling person to accept your perspective.

If you follow these six keys to preventing being a victim of gaslighting, you can keep your head up and you will void being burned.

For more information about controlling relationships, browse our domestic abuse resources and obtain Instant Access to Free Survivor Success eInsights. Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D. helps people recognize, end and heal from domestic abuse. Copyright 2009 Jeanne King, Ph.D.

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Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
Abuse and Recovery
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gaslighting psychological abuse

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